| For now, we'll learn to say goodbye. |
[25 May 2009|11:34pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 chipper |
] |
Dear ____,
I know you're out there somewhere and I don't want you to wait patiently for me to come. I want you to go out there, do reckless things, date countless girls so that when you finally meet me, you will see for yourself how different I am from those other girls that you've dated and you will see just how special I am.
I'm going to do the same as well so that when I finally meet you, I too will know for sure that you are the one.
For now, we'll learn to say goodbye and meet again in another day, another place, another time. (:
xoxo,
me.
A comment I posted to one of the poster's in letterstolovers. (: Awesome entry she has, people should comment on that.
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[21 Apr 2009|03:47pm] |
Dear diary,
It feels really good to finally know that I've said my piece. I've said all the things that I've ever wanted to say out to you. I remembered the times when I constantly teared and wishes that I could just say all the things that I have to say because I have so much to say and tell you.
Now that I have say it all out, I don't have anything else left to be said. I don't have anything to say anymore. And it feels so darn good.
I don't have any reason to be sad over you anymore because it's all over now. Doubts cleared, feelings out in the open. If I had known that it would feel this good, I would have told you sooner. (:
xoxo,
me
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| You did it. |
[20 Apr 2009|04:27pm] |
Dear boy,
I've never been happier than this now that it's all out. I've always dream about this day. Something that I've always wanted. I'm really very happy, even though we are not together. But not being together doesn't mean we can't be happy. I never expected anything more than this anyway, and I'm just fine with this. I'm more than fine, I'm ecstatic.
Because I've always known that I do really like you a lot, but I've never really wanted you. Yes I like you a lot but I didn't want you.
Maybe it's hard for some people to comprehend this, but that is honestly how I felt and what I wanted to do all these while. I just wanted him to know of my feelings, but I don't want anything more. And that makes me happy, to know that I'm not really such a coward after all.
xoxo,
me.
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| You're a brave young girl. |
[20 Apr 2009|02:47am] |
Dear self,
I am so proud of you for finding the courage in you to finally tell him that you liked him. Took you almost 4 years to tell, but that's okay, I'm still proud of you. (:
xoxo,
me.
Ps: And he said he's proud of me as well. (:
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| Scoff. |
[04 Mar 2009|03:28pm] |
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I don't see you anymore. I don't see you anywhere anymore.
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| Goodnight! Goodnight! |
[27 Feb 2009|03:36pm] |
I'm not living in the clouds anymore. I've finally came back down to earth, to reality, to the cold hard facts of life. It doesn't hurt as much, maybe because I've already seen it coming. I was well prepared.
And no, I'm not going to do that anymore. There's no point to it anymore. Screw those vows.
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| What's the point? |
[25 Feb 2009|12:28am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 pessimistic |
] |
We keep breaking up and making up. We keep making excuses for each other. What's the point. It's all just a neverending vicious cycle.
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| Another night, another dream wasted on you. |
[24 Feb 2009|02:51am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 hurt |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Three Cheers For Five Years - Mayday Parade |
] |
Dear boy,
You didn't help one bit with your lack of enthusiasm in your response. I really put in a lot of effort to pluck up the courage to talk to you,and you, you always disappoint me with your response, or rather the lack of it. Yes, I know I'm not that interesting to you, but is it really so hard just to have a decent conversation with you for just a mere second? ):
xoxo,
me. ):
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| (: |
[27 Jan 2009|11:24am] |
| [ |
mood |
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 peaceful |
] |
It'd been rather peaceful here. My heart's at ease, my mind's at ease. It's really very peaceful here.
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| Maybe. |
[15 Jan 2009|02:48am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 content |
] |
Dear diary,
I am pretty happy and contented right now. Things have been looking good so far. I hope this stays. (:
xoxo,
girl.
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[10 Jan 2009|03:19pm] |
Dear diary,
Yesterday was awesome. You did managed to prove me wrong and I did enjoy every single bit of yesterday.
Thank you.
xoxo,
me.
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| Playing on repeat. |
[09 Jan 2009|12:23am] |
Dear diary,
As much as I hate to admit it, I am actually pretty excited for tmr. I don't know what to expect. But, something in my gut tells me that it won't happened. And it's really not a hard thing to believe considering the fact that you HAVE killed my hopes that were built so high before.
Remember the time when you and your friend forced me to attend the BBQ. Well I did, and I was so excited to be able to see you and spend the day with you but in the end, I found out that you weren't going. I wasted my time with people I don't like, all because of you. You have no idea how angry I was, how bloody disappointed I was.
I was so mad at you that I screamed at you the next day. Yes, that was how mad and angry and disappointed I was.
So, it's really no surprise if tmr never happens. I'm too used to all these disappointments, broken promises and hopeless nothings.
You just have to prove me wrong, before I can finally start believing in you again. For now, I don't believe a single shit that comes out of your mouth and I have completely zero trust in you.
Have a nice day. (:
xoxo,
girl.
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| Smiley boy, |
[07 Jan 2009|12:34am] |
I said "hi" to you along the corridors.
For the first time, that "hi" meant nothing more than just a polite greeting from me to you. I've finally acknowledge your existence. But I'm sure you know still, you're not the one I've been in love with.
I thought you could, but you couldn't.
You still lose out to that boy I fell in love with 3 years ago. That boy still win me over, every single time.
Sorry.
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[31 Dec 2008|11:22am] |
It's actually much more easier to let go and forget when I don't see you around, when I don't have to be reminded of you every single day. I'm actually much more happier right now, I'm much more happier during this holiday. I don't see you around during the holidays, thus I don't get hopeless hopes from you each time I come across your path.
I thought the holidays would be hard to get through, but I guess I was wrong. But school is starting soon, and I will have to see you often soon and I know, that's when the rollercoaster ride will begin again.
But right now, I'm don't really care about that just yet. I'll worry about that later. Right now, I'm just proud of myself for not even thinking much of you these days. (:
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| Dear smiley boy, |
[21 Dec 2008|03:20pm] |
I deleted you off facebook.
This may seem nothing but it meant a lot to me. It's a first step for me.
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| It's too soon to say goodbye. |
[09 Dec 2008|11:10pm] |
Dear diary,
you left me confuse again. I think I might like you but I'm too caught up in my past to even make space for you. I'm sorry but this shouldn't even be an excuse.
This is pathetic.
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| When will things ever go right? |
[05 Dec 2008|02:35am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 cranky |
] |
Dear diary,
Maybe the reason why I can't let go is because I don't want to. But .. just how long can I stand you treating me this way? The incident that happened this morning, just shows how unhappy we are. You hurt me real bad once again. And time over time I was willing to take the pain because I like the pain. I like the idea of fighting so hard for this. It makes it all worthwhile, it makes it all more stronger.
But after today's incident, you made me walk back home with my mind all messed up. With my mind thinking of all sort of things revolving around one notion, you. I asked myself questions. Questions like " how much longer can I continue fighting for you? " " could it be, that nothing's going to change? " I thought hard. I really did.
You know there were many times when I tell myself I'm quitting you, I'm out. But just one smile from you can make me forget just how angry I am at you. Forget how much you've hurt me. Just one teeny weeny smile can make me fall in love with you all over again and embrace myself in getting hurt all over again.
I just don't know how long I can fight for you anymore. I will fight for you but I won't fight forever. Bear that in mind.
You see, I don't know how to quit you. I don't know how to let go.
xoxo,
girl.
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| Being without you, I can't imagine. |
[04 Dec 2008|12:43am] |
No, I just think it feels wrong to like someone else but you. I can't like anyone else other than you. It just feels so wrong. :/
I've been with you for too long to start over with another.
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